Is Moving Abroad Right for You?

Something you'll hear me say over and over again is that moving abroad has been the most impactful and rewarding decision I've ever made. And I know many of my friends that I've met overseas share this same sentiment. However, it's not for everyone.

Though moving abroad is an enticing adventure many Americans dream about (especially in these, um, trying times), how do you know if it’s the right move for you? Before packing your bags and booking that one-way ticket, here are some critical questions to help you navigate this life-changing decision. So grab a journal and let's dig in!

1. How Adaptable Are You?

Once upon a time, I was a freshman in university at a small Christian school in East Tennessee. Each first-year student at the school was required to take this thing called the "StrengthsFinder" which is, as I'm sure you've guessed, an assessment to help identify your top five strengths from a list of 34. Though I don't remember all five of mine, I do remember my number one strength -- adaptability, babes. This has served me well throughout the years, because if you're going to build a life overseas...

flexibility is key.

Reflect: More situations than I can count have forced me to loosen the grasp I have on my plans and my expectations over the past decade. And that's just par for the course. Life abroad can will be unpredictable. Whether it’s dealing with unexpected bureaucratic hurdles, language barriers, or missing the comforts of home, adaptability is essential. Can you roll with the punches and find joy in the unexpected?

Practical Tips:

• Stay Flexible: Approach every situation with curiosity, an open mind, and a willingness to adapt.

• Embrace Change: View each challenge as an opportunity to learn and grow.

• Stay Positive: Keep a journal to keep your focus on the positives amidst the challenges.

2. Can You Handle Loneliness?

Seoul is truly the most isolating place I've ever lived. The schmandemic didn't help with that, of course, but even before and after that chaos, making friends here has been really hard.

In comparison, building a new community after I moved to Eswatini was an absolute breeze. I was surrounded by great people almost all the time, and yet I still felt this pesky loneliness that I couldn't exactly put my finger on at the time.

In each of these situations, I had to learn to be okay with loneliness and accept it as part of the process, not something I should try to avoid. So after I let myself have my moment to feel all those feels, I got to work putting myself out there, attending events, joining online communities, and walking up to random strangers at the grocery store (actual event). It's not easy to be vulnerable, but some of my best relationships have come from me getting uncomfy AS and making the initiative to build relationships.

Another thing to keep in mind is to not confine your friendships to only the people who are most similar to you in age, gender, nationality, ethnicity, career, hobbies, shoe size, etc. Sure, it's good to have people in the same chapter of life as you. However, the people I've found myself befriending abroad are 100% not the typical "type" of friend I've had back home. This has been such a wonderful thing and my life is richer for it.

Reflect: Moving abroad often means leaving behind family, friends, and your support network. Are you prepared to experience moments of loneliness? On the flip side, are you willing to put in the effort to build a new community and friendships?

Practical Tips:

• Join Expat Groups: Look for local expat communities online before you move.

• Be Open to New Relationships: Say yes to social invitations, even if they push you out of your comfort zone.

• Stay Connected: Regular video calls, messages, rapid-fire reel sharing with loved ones back home can help you alleviate homesickness and continue to keep your relationships alive and thriving.

3. Are You Ready for a Culture Shock?

Adjusting to a different culture goes far beyond the everyday "oopsies" like forgetting to bow or talking too loud on the subway, and that's because culture is a deeply-rooted, living, breathing, all-consuming thing. It informs how we think, perceive, behave, and believe. The innate nature of our national and familial cultures also make them incredibly difficult to articulate.

So, stepping into a brand new culture can often feel like putting together a 1,000-piece puzzle of a brick wall without the box or any corner pieces. Bewildering. Unfair. Exhausting.

Reflect: Living overseas will challenge everything you know about daily life. Are you excited about stepping into a culture where traditions, languages, and even grocery shopping can be vastly different? If the thought of cultural immersion excites you more than it scares you, that's a good sign.

Practical Tips:

• Research: Dive into blogs, watch vlogs, and read books to expose yourself to a wide range of experiences about your potential new home.

• Language Learning: Start learning the basics of the local language—it’s a gesture that goes a long way.

• Cultural Etiquette: Familiarize yourself with cultural norms, attitudes, beliefs, values, and dos and don’ts to ease your transition.

4. Are You Financially Prepared?

A common question I hear first-time expats ask is how much they should have saved before they move. But since personal finance habits wildly differ from person to person, there's really no good answer. However, it's good to know what to expect before you start the journey of uprooting your life and building a home overseas.

Moving abroad can easily be more costly than anticipated. From visa fees to all new housewares, expenses can add up quickly. For example, if you're moving from a place with good public transportation infrastructure to a more suburban area where you'll need a car, that's something you'll definitely need to plan for. Do you love to eat out? Do some fact-finding for how much that will cost in your new home. Even if you know you'll have a salary as soon as you hit the ground, it's wise to take some time to monitor your current spending habits, set realistic expectations, and adjust/plan accordingly.

Reflect: Are you financially ready to handle the transition and sustain yourself in a new country?

Practical Tips:

• Create a Budget: Include all potential expenses such as visas, rent, utilities, moving costs, and unexpected costs.

• Save Up: Have a financial cushion to cover at least 2-3 months of living expenses (if you have a work contract) or up to six months if you're moving on a working holiday or similar visa.

• Understand Cost of Living: Research the cost of living in your potential new home to avoid surprises.

5. What Are Your Expectations?

Picture this -- you're 24, have lived in the same place your whole life, very dissatisfied with your current job/life/relationship situation and you're feeling the itch for adventure. You've been a fan of K-pop and K-dramas since your high school years and have always been interested in moving abroad. So, you start to watch vlogs on YouTube about what it's like to live in Korea as an expat. Soon, your entire social media algorithm is filled with cute Seoul cafe and day-in-the-life of an English teacher in Korea content.

You decide to leap, imagining a life in Korea that is just as picturesque as what you've seen online. In this vision, you have the cute, sunny apartment in the best neighborhood in Seoul, a teaching job where you love your students and coworkers, the handsome oppa of your dreams, and you go to aesthetic cafes and instagrammable popups all the time. People are friendly to you and it's so easy to make good friends that you can do alllll the fun things with. You're so excited to start this new chapter!

Then, you arrive. Your school sticks you in a goshiwon (capsule apartment) for the first week where you barely have room for your luggage. You end up teaching eight classes a day rather than the five they promised in your offer. Your coworkers are burnt out and have little capacity for investing in a new friendship. When you finally move into your apartment, it's tiny, the windows are barred, there's only a hot plate for cooking, the neighbors are loud, and it constantly smells like smoke. And on top of that, you just got elbowed by a grandma on the bus. The chasm between your expectations and reality grows wider by the day and your dream soon becomes your nightmare. A few months later, deeply disappointed by the daily life you're living, you break your one-year contract and move back home with a bad taste in your mouth.

If you don't hear anything else hear this -- managing expectations is the single MOST important aspect of building a new life abroad. This is something I'll keep shouting from the mountaintops until my voice goes hoarse. I've seen far too many people move countries with the belief that they will be happier, healthier, more fulfilled, and more successful in another country. However, this is simply not true. In itself, the act of moving abroad will not magically turn you into something you have never been. That's up to you.

Reflect: I want to encourage you to become curious and painfully honest with yourself. Why are you moving abroad? Is it for adventure, career opportunities, personal growth, or a change of scenery? Can you embrace discomfort and allow it to grow you? Are you willing to adopt a posture of humility? At the end of this journey, what are you hoping to find? Working through all of these questions is absolutely crucial and can be a matter of make or break in your overseas experience. Having a clear purpose will help guide your decision-making and keep you focused when the inevitable challenges arise.

Practical Tips:

• Reflect: Spend time journaling on the questions above or talking through them with trusted friends or family. What did you notice? Use your answers to write out a new set of expectations.

• Set Goals: Define what you hope to achieve by living abroad.

• Stay True to Yourself: Ensure your decision aligns with your personal values and long-term goals.

Making the decision to move abroad is a significant step. By asking yourself these questions and reflecting on your answers, you’ll be better prepared to make an informed decision. Moving abroad can be a transformative experience, filled with growth, adventure, and countless new opportunities. Whether you decide to take the plunge or stay put, remember that the right choice is the one that feels true to you.

Are you ready to embrace the adventure of living overseas? I'd love to walk you through the next steps through one-on-one coaching! Use the contact form below to get started.